I have a very complicated relationship with my ex. He is a great guy – just not the guy for me. but for some reason we cannot stay away from each other. We don’t want to date each other but we have this need to be in each others lives.
It’s vaguely concernable.
For two years he has been trying to start a business venture with me. It went from co-writing a book to co-hosting a podcast to now starting a magazine together. His pitch was that he needed a hobby and he wanted my writing expertise.
I said yes.
And then instantly I had the moment where you think, “This could really good or this could be really bad.”
I choose to believe this will be really good.
It has all the hallmarks of great success. But to honest it could be disastrous. The ex and I are not similar people, except for in two regards.
- We are geeks and proud of it.
- We like working for ourselves.
He has been successfully working as a private consultant for a number of years while i am just starting on the self-employment ladder. But we both have this drive to be successful working for ourselves and to not have to return to the corporate world and sit in cubicles.
After my “oh-my-word-what-did-I-agree-to?” moment i made a Venn Diagram (remember those?). Venn diagrams are great for the unclear moments in life. I make them often.
As you can see there are a good number of both positives and negatives for this new venture. The negatives are mostly personal issues. I am not good at delegation. It’s on my list to learn. I like control. I think I say that every blog post and it’s still true. I don’t like unknowns or things that are out of my control. They make me nervous.
I don’t know the ex’s friends. He thinks they are great but I’m not a big fan of the people in his life. There hasn’t been one yet that I like or think he needs in his life. Now, one of those people, some guy I’ve never heard of, is going to be a staff writer at a magazine that my name will be on,. And i know nothing about this guy. Not even a twitter handle.
That’s not exactly reassuring.
And there will be NO income.
At least not for a while.
This magazine would strictly be a labor of love.
But the content is all stuff I talk about and tweet about everyday. comics, video games, books, movies and food. It promises to be all of our super geeky conversations but for others to read. That’s exciting. And scary.
And it comes with all this responsibility. Locating comics. Finding indie musicians to profile. Reading and recommending books I think others should read. and the food… I don’t know about the food section.
I’m not a chef. I’m a girl with a dozen allergies that tries to eat decently. What gives me the authority to talk about someone else’s gastronomical needs.
But I gave my word. And though I’m still a little wary i’m more excited than not.
So, here’s to my new new venture which will be implemented as I navigate away from my cubicle life.
My 365 day transformation just got a little heftier.